It's a painful day for many of us, I know the power of depression. You will be missed.
Currently 99 reads and no replies...an absolutely demonstrative representation of the social stigmas and lack of empathy towards those of us that have suffered a clinical depression.
It's not that people don't care, it's largely that they just don't have a f'ing clue on how to respond.
Please, educate yourself about the issue before it's someone you know and love being laid to rest...and realize the pain someone like that suffers that they would choose instead to take their own life.
I wouldn't wish the pain of depression on even those I despise. It's essentially torture.
Maybe some of us didn't respond because we didn't know much about Mr.B. I have heard rumors since that his death may have had nothing to do with either depression or even suicide.
I would suggest rather than ripping people for not responding to your clearly meddlesome soapbox issue to instead look at the fact that Mr.B lived large at the end of his life.
suicide is terrible;
my neighbor / friend committed suicide recently.
message me anytime about anything if you need a distraction from whatever
I hope that you are not speaking about Anthony Banks here...
@lord_bondslave...I didn't rip on anyone. I made an observation, not a judgement. You should consider trying to be a less-insensitive human being.
@gregstull - thanks dude, I may take you up on the offer. It's people like yourself that make this world a better place. Empathy is becoming a rare thing these days.
"they just don't have a f'ing clue on how to respond."
Yep. Not judgemental.
I took a moment and considered what you said about me being insensitive. If I was insensitive I would have just blown you off. Depression is a lot like people enslaved to alcohol. If you dwell on it, it owns you. If you master it and put it in it's place, you do things like I suggested: live large. I could talk about my own issues in the past with what you call depression, but I have come to see that depression is a lot like alcoholism, non-existent except in the minds of those who believe it exists. Alcoholism is not a disease, it is a decision to allow alcohol a place in your mind. While sadness is real like alcohol, depression is merely choosing to let real sadness control you, instead of doing what you would really rather be doing. If you want to consider me insensitive for pointing out what an ass you were being and for opening up the opportunity to show you that you still haven't let go of your sadness, I'll live on. And though I will never know for sure, I'd put money on Anthony not dying at all by suicide.
A serious question for anyone: do you care enough to be mean to someone who needs it?
If you think internet bullying is a form of tuff love you need serious help, pal.
I think you should concentrate on making something that resembles music.
First off, people grieve in many ways, whether it be by crying, laughing for odd reasons, yelling, closing up emotionally, et al. Depression has many forms, & I would argue to a large extent that it is nothing like alcoholism.
Depression in many cases occurs after a loss of a loved one, a horrible life change, a job loss, etc. There are other forms & reasons of Depression caused or brought on by a chemical imbalance for example.
There are other people suffering from other Mental & or Health issues that eventually succumb to a form of Depression (a lot of which is beyond their control, thus needing medication & or clinical therapy) such as: Bi-Polarism, Schizophrenia, Mania & Hyper Mania, Anorexia Nervosis, Epilepsy & Narcolepsy, Crohn's & Ileitis Disease, et al.
I personally have Epilepsy, Greater Occipital Nerve Damage (Parasitically caused), & have dealt with mild Depression for years. I turn 48 tomorrow, & have dealt with Depression for over 15 plus years. I have been blessed & feel privileged to have helped many people through difficult & dark times in their lives, young & old.
Nothing will ever get accomplished, solved or sorted out if everyone is at each other's throat, throwing around anger in the form of semantics like it is the right thing to do. We need to show compassion & lead by example.
My thoughts & Prayers go out to Tony's (Boudain), Kate's (Spade), & everyone elses families that have dealt with a loss in their family, due to suicide. I personally have dealt with suicide in my own family (close cousin). So I personally know first hand of how damn hard it is to lose someone so dear to you by Drpression & Suicide.
☆ If anyone here ever needs a person to talk to, get unbiased & positive advice, or just needs to have a laugh & a smile, PLEAE, CONTACT ME. I am here for you!!
Much Love & Respect,
STEPHEN, W. BMA,MScP,PEng.
3:6:T RECORDS [CDN,US,UK,NL]
So everyone on here has a lack of empathy, not a fucking clue, I'm insensitive and a bully.
Have fun on your ride pal. This is where I get off. Take your bullshit non-judgments and shove them right up your ass.
@lord_bondlave...dude, you might learn something from the responses of Mikal and greg. Look at the strength of the emotion in your response, something obviously struck a nerve in you.
Quote: "So everyone on here has a lack of empathy, not a fucking clue, I'm insensitive and a bully."
You forgot the part where I used passive aggressive tendencies to insinuate your music...you know. Cause...you know.
But I can help you with that!
And to Stephen, wow, seriously. I'm starting to like this place! It makes me really happy to see the tides finally shifting, the Internet doesn't have to be an angry, confrontational experience, there are truly caring people out there amongst the sharks.
I suffered a pretty severe clinical depression about 18 years ago. I am blessed to realize the strength and resilience of character that addressing issues can bring to those of us that are lucky. It made me a stronger person. Lots of hard work there too, largely CBT stuff.
Then, in the past few years, I lost my only brother (43, arythmia), my father (blood cancer), and had to move in with my mother because she had 2 heart attacks and a stroke within 12 hours and had to have immediate brain surgery. Due to her already weakened condition they had to keep her in an induced comma for 5 weeks. It took 6 months for her language and abilities to return, well, as much as they would.
After that I lived with her for a few years, before dementia took over and ... blah, blah, blah... I have taken care of a colony of feral cats for almost 16 years now and due to their ages I lost 14 of them in the past 2 years. And I'm leaving out government involvement due to false allegations of abuse, inept social workers, teams of lawyers to restore POA, uncooperative parasitic banks, insane relatives and..... It's a bad script for a Michael Moore doc. It would take days to type out
So, yeah, I often think of depression as "realistic" or "non". It's easy to look at a situation like mine and say, hmm, that would probably be hard on almost anyone. A series of specific events that lead to depression, that would add up on paper using a psychiatric litmus test.
With some like Anthony, Chris Cornell and some you mentioned it's so (seemingly] different, coloured by an infinite amount of elements so we feel like we kinda know or relate to them, whether or not in reality we would.
People like me, maybe you, often looked to those like Anthony, Chris Cornell etc. as an inspiration, something to look forward to when you truly conquer depression. So when you see them commit suicide, those that appear to have so much - good looks, talent, fame, money.....Ouch. As much as I sincerely feel for the pain that lead them there, for their friends, families, fans - I also feel for those who are, for lack of a better word, vicariously distraught at the death of their own aspirations.
Seeing Anthony go like that, and me mentally trying to imagine what he must have gone thru (drugs or not) to feel that he needed to take his own life to escape... that was harder on me and set me back further than my own personal problems.
I think our modern society creates more lonely people than ever before. It's almost like the more connected we become, the more isolated we become.
"Discuss anything here with fellow users, keep it clean, no personal attacks. "
"Discuss anything here with fellow users, keep it clean, no personal attacks. "